Perhaps it’s because I’m in my 50s, or maybe it’s my chronic health conditions and disability, or the changes in the political arena, but I have felt a huge shift in myself in the last year. The hedonism of my 40’s has passed. My body’s changes invites new perspectives and needs. I no longer want […]
Living with long covid is not easy. It has disabled me and has drastically affected the rope play I can do. Self suspension is particularly challenging, since I’m in charge of all the planning and mitigation and self suspension is very demanding on my body. With some ideas from some fantastic self tiers in an […]
It’s International Menopause Awareness Day. More than half of the entire world’s population will experience the menopause and perimenopause. Menopause is the time from a person no longer having their periods for a year, and perimenopause is the phase before that. Our bodies, minds, thoughts and feelings change in a variety of ways. These changes […]
The journey into kink is a fraught one for most people. We live in environments and cultures that want sex and relationships to look a certain way, for whatever reason. Whether it is hedonistic or conservative, who we are and the desires we feel can sometimes mis-match completely. On a human level, introspectionally, we might […]
Like, really hurts most of the time. Some rope can be more decorative, kinda like a kinky fashion statement. But even that sort of rope carries risks and need careful negotiations to avoid harm. However, in the main, most people do rope to feel constrained, helpless and/or pain. Being held in rope, shifts the physche […]
Is “Shibari” racist? What about kinbaku? What aspects of our rope practice, is in fact, racist? Shibari. Kinbaku. Alien words to most people. These are Japanese words from the Japanese culture of rope bondage. Shibari means knots in direct translation. Kinbaku means tight binding. I see so many people using these terms, even as their […]
When we first join rope and kink spaces, we often feel very nervous. We don’t know what to expect nor how the people we meet may respond to us. We seek validation and acceptance of who we are, and perhaps people to play with. We often want to learn about the lifestyle and issues around […]
When I moved into my home, I found a rose quartz in a pond in my garden. For a long while it decorated my kitchen window seal. Then I discovered rope and I found a new use for it. I saw many photos of similar stones being used in rope bondage. It is often used […]
I was recently asked a very good question by someone relatively new to rope, regarding how to manage the emotional impacts whilst untying a rope bottom. In that discussion, and in many similar ones with other people, it occurred to me just how little emphasis we put on the untying process. Which is sad. Because, […]
I was in a class with DevynStone on building M/s relationships. He explained his process and at one point in discussing consent, he said how we all have our own consent. I love that! Whenever I’ve taught consent or gotten into those in depth discussions with people, I’m always mindful of just how each of us look […]